Tending the Garden

I’ve been a gardener since I was a Very Small Person. It’s a little crazy, but I had very flat feet as a kid and my Dad was convinced if I walked around barefoot in the dirt it would help strengthen my arches. Mom was, of course, horrified that not only would my feet get dirty but I’d run the risk of picking up a tapeworm. I delighted more in my Dad’s choice.

Right after Memorial Day we’d get busy. As a five-year-old I’m not certain how much I helped, but there was a lot of hoeing and planting and tending to be done. I became the official Planter of the Green Beans – the seeds needed to be placed a certain distance apart and my hand was the right width to determine that. So, place a seed, move my hand, place a seed, and so on.

The real challenge was tending the garden. It required constant care, weeding, watering, fertilizing, addressing diseases and pests, and eventually harvesting the crop and putting it by.

I continue to garden, sometimes professionally but mostly at home for my own calm and focus. Flowers are a little fussier – they need daily dead-heading to stimulate increased blossoms on the plant. In my area they also need protection from elk and deer, although often it’s more beneficial for a fawn to have a tender shoot than for me to have a posy.

Most of all I love the correlation between tending to a green garden and tending to our relationships. Romance, friendship, they all require vigilant attention and sometimes a bit of sacrifice. Without time and nurturing they wither and die. The perennials, the ones that lie dormant, can be revitalized by turning sharp focus back to tending them. They’ll need a little extra care at first but the ongoing rewards are far greater than the task.

I could go on about the friendships I’ve been able to rekindle recently and the wonderful people who have invited me to pick up where we left off. More, though, I’d like to share something that has given me pause and hope for our global garden.

A young man (Bruno Lucidarme) with whom I’m familiar on a mountaineering website I frequent posted a thread in one of the forums asking for suggestions on how to help his friend Derek. Derek discovered recently that he has Multiple Sclerosis. With that, his wife left him and his house in now in foreclosure. Needless to say he’s had more than his share of lumps in recent months. While he was a funny guy and loved to tell a good joke, his mood has turned somber and he’s having a tough time. He’s becoming frustrated with his resulting decrease in physical activity and misses his road bike most of all.

We came up with the idea of a card shower and posted that request to anyone interested. Apparently it’s done wonders, as you’ll read below:

Bruno,

You do not know me, but I am a lifetime friend of Derek Nickerson. I wanted to personally thank you for everything you have done to help Derek through this difficult time in his life. What a wonderful, caring friend you are!!! He has received so many uplifting letters, cards and e-mails offering words of encouragement that have truly touched him and let him know that there are many people out there “rooting” for him. He has read two of the letters to me over the phone. As he read both, he began to cry wondering how people who did not know him could care enough to offer their help and concern. He truly has been touched by your act of kindness. So many times we think about doing something to touch our friends and loved ones in need, but it goes no further than a thought. You on the other hand have put your thoughts into action and I am so thankful for that. Derek is truly blessed to have a friend like you!!!

Again I thank you from the bottom of my heart,

Missy

Derek has a blog at http://fortnickerson.blogspot.com where you can read his own words.

If you would like to help tend this garden with something as simple as a card and a stamp, please email me and I’ll send you Derek’s address. It only takes a minute and seems to be doing a world of good. Funny, serious, inspirational, you decide. Such a small gesture, such a magnificent opportunity to tend to one of our own.